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By Debra Betterly It doesnt matter how old we are, matters of the heart go on forever. It is well known that a healthy diet, exercise, and attitude are powerful determinants of a healthy heart. But, knowing how to give and receive love and appreciation may still be the heart’s best medicine. Since healthy relationships are so vital to living our best life, as a Life Coach, relationships often naturally integrate themselves into whatever life change my client is trying to make. Relationships are a big part of our personal Spirit, Mind Body landscape and affect every part of our being. Good or bad-how they play out in our life, and physical, mental and spiritual health, is up to us. And no, if we are not happy with our relationships, it’s not the other people you need to change -there’s no place for blame in a healthy relationship-its us. It is often at midlife that we finally realize that having healthy relationships is up to us and no one else. Once a client has accepted this, the real work can begin. Taking a holistic approach, here are some ways to prevent problems in, or refresh relationships, that I’ve found helpful for myself and my clients. 1. Be Generous With Your Appreciation. How often do you feel or give appreciation? How important is appreciation? Studies show that appreciation of others and of ourself is strongly correlated with happiness and health. I know of people who have quit their jobs for not feeling appreciated for their contributions in the workplace. I’ve also seen the opposite. When people are acknowledged for their efforts, they feel better about giving and often go beyond the call of duty. Experiment with this and experience the magic for yourself. Appreciation changes people. In families, appreciation can minimize or prevent problems. Start appreciating those you care about for things you wouldn’t even think of appreciating them for! All those things you take for granted, like “Thanks for being out there earning a living so we can pay our bills each month; Thanks for the juggling you do everyday to take care of our family; Thank you for being a wonderful kid; Thank you for cleaning up your room; Thank you for bringing up this issue that we need to deal with; Thanks for the great meals you make for us” You get the idea. Make it a habit. Get the whole family involved. It may feel awkward at first, but after awhile the energy in your home will change, and problems will begin to disappear. It works just as well in the workplace. Good job whenIt made me smile whenI know you’ve been working really hard lately andthen watch company moral skyrocket! One other interesting phenomenon, if you want something from other, you must give it first. So if you want more appreciation in your life, start doling it out and watch your wish come true! 2. State Your Intention or The Purpose Behind the Communication. According to Dr. Rick Brinkman, a lifestyle management guru and author of “Life By Design”, whenever we communicate there is always a purpose behind that communication. A very effective way to communicate is to let people know your purpose or your (positive) intention first to avoid misunderstanding. Without the desired intention, defenses easily go up. People often need to know where we are coming from before they can really let go and listen. For example, you might say, “I love you and I really need to clear the air about what happened the other night”. This states the intention first and has a loving, positive tone. Consider the difference if the person had said, “I feel frustrated about what happened the other night and I think we need to talk about it”. The intention is unclear and immediately causes the other person to put up a protective wall! Always state your intention first. 3. Assume a Positive Intention in Others. Always assume the best intention in others. People will literally fall all over themselves to fulfill your positive expectations of them. There have been studies that prove when students work with teachers who believe in them to excel, they do. The expectations of the teachers get projected on to the students and in such cases, the students IQ is tested higher than normal for that student. This is the power of your projections! If we want to bring out the very best in our spouse, clients, employees and kids, we can start by just assuming the best and projecting positive expectations. Sometimes an intention is good, but the actions are not welcome. For example, your husband decides to surprise you and rearrange the furniture. His intentions were good, but you hated what he did. If you just said, “You shouldn’t have done this, you need to move everything back the way it was”-do you think he would take the initiative to do something “nice” for you again? Probably not! But, if you said, “Thank you honey for caring about the way our home looks, it was really great of you make this effort for me. But, what you didn’t know is I really don’t like it this way, can we try something different?” With this response he will not be afraid to try to please you another time. 4. Seek First to Understand. An argument is two people wanting to be understood when neither one wants to understand. How to resolve an argument? Let the other person feel understood first. When they feel understood, they will then be able to give their full attention to us. Listening is the key to understanding. Let them know you are listening by giving specific feedback so the other person knows they are being heard and understood. The best way to do this is to simply take their words and give it back to them. This is a special technique used by counselors and coaches. Their words are special to them; it doesn’t work as well to try to use our own language. We can ask questions for clarity if we need to. Listening and caring provides the feeling the other person is looking for. The final step is to confirm the other person feels understood by saying something like, Do I understand this correctly? Then it’s our turn to talk. 5. Enjoy Differences. Recognize it is wonderful to have differences, and then to respect them. Each individual processes feelings differently according to their own life experience. If we are sensitive to this we can discover the best way to support the other person and get both needs met. A really useful question to ask when some one close to us starts a statement with ” You dont”, is “How would you know if I did?”, For example, ” How would you know if I supported you?”, or “How would you know if I cared for you?”. Keep in mind, the people close to us often have their own criteria for getting their desires fulfilled based on their own model of the world! And it may not be the same as ours, so we need to ask. For example, one persons criteria for a romantic evening may be very different than their partners! The intent may be the same (wanting intimate time together), but how to fulfill that intent is often not. Again, asking questions helps a lot! Ask, “What does a romantic evening look like for you?”, and then you may need to find a compromise. 6. Notice the Energy of Your Intention. According to the bestseller “A Return to Love” by Marianne Williamson, when we come from a place of love and acceptance, and truly accepting people as they are, has the miraculous effect of helping them be better people. When we are always telling people what’s wrong with them, we don’t help them, instead, we paralyze them with shame and guilt. When we accept others unconditionally, we help them to feel good about themselves, to relax, and to find their way. This doesn’t mean we can’t share constructive criticism, but again, and energy of positive intent is important. It is the energy, good or bad, that is carried in our communication. The miracle is the authentic intention to communicate with love not fear. According to the book, “the key to communication is not what we say, but rather the attitude that lies behind what we say”. A Relationship Tool to Try. The following relationship tool can help with maintaining healthy relationships. It is called a relationship agreement. Sit down with your spouse, your son/daughter, or your business partner and come up with some agreements about how to communicate with each other. Then when things start to go amuck, (and when our feelings turn into emotional reactions, they easily do!), you can get the agreement out and say Remember how we agreed to communicate? Examples of mutual relationship agreements might include: * To have weekly meetings. * To communicate without blame. * To communicate only from love-not fear. * To take turns with who gets to start when settling an argument * To create and have a plan for how to exit an argument so you can come back to it after you’ve gained some perspective. * To always state the positive intent first. Every two people who come together bring uniqueness to that relationship, so each particular relationship agreement will be unique as well. Other useful strategies include creating special and sacred time alone with our spouse or child, bringing new skills or hobbies to a relationship to share and appreciate together, and reading relationship books or listening to tapes with partners and discussing how we might apply the information to our own relationships. Try this: Think of one relationship in your life that is meaningful to you, but is not going as well as you would like. Choose from the ideas in this newsletter that feel comfortable for you to try. Then apply the changes you want to make. Be patient and journal the changes you begin to see in the other person and in yourself. Debra Betterly,Ph.D.is a Life Coach whose specialty is midlife mastery. This article is derived from her newsletter, Second Acts, a spirit-mind-body approach for women re-inventing the second half of life. Please visit http://www.amazingjouneycoach.com to subscribe to this free monthly eNewsletter and also to learn more about her program Put Your Dream to Work and her eBook Awakening the Spirit Within. You can also email her at amazingjourney@charter.net Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Debra_Betterly http://EzineArticles.com/?Communication-Tips-for-Heart-Healthy-Relationships&id=56528 no credit check rehab loans personal loan document examples how do personal loans work car dealerships in atlanta with no credit check

By Geraint Ap Iorwerth I was in my late teens when I first read Henry Barbusse’s Under Fire, a novel set in the first world war trenches. It led me to consider the question: who does God listen to when He is bombarded with the prayers of different nations and religions, all equally convinced that He is on their side? As I grew up, the questions became more problematic: what kind of god are we talking about? Who would want to follow a supposedly supreme being whose followers regularly take up arms in his name? While Muslim leaders are urging their followers to look honestly at the health of their faith, Christian bishops are silent. There is almost a total lack of prophetic critique of the west’s way of waging war on terrorism and no cries for the Israeli government to end its oppression of the Palestinian people. The Judaeo-Christian religion has evidently nothing to repent. God is on our side. Victory is assured. Or, in the words of President Bush: “We will not falter and we will not fail.” The western coalition consists of secular states, and yet we are suddenly hearing a great deal about God from some of our politicians. American currency bears the words “in God we trust”. God Bless America is almost a second anthem. Early on in the recent conflict in Iraq, the press was allowed to photograph US pilots praying together before taking off on a mission. But who are they praying to? Bush even summed up his speech to the US congress on September 20 2001 with the prayer: “In all that lies before us, may God grant us wisdom.” What is this wisdom that he invokes? Bush is still a president with a mission in his second term. The leader of the world’s only superpower has a divine vocation to “defend freedom”. Prior to his speech to Congress, Bush was blessed by another president, this time of the Southern Baptist convention, with the words: “I believe you are God’s man for this war. God’s hand is on you.” Bush is no Christian fundamentalist. His religion appears to be a primitive kind of theism, popular among many in mainstream American religion. Bush’s agenda, sanctioned by his God, is to root out the evil one(s), with salvation in the guise of America close at hand. He declared in a TV interview, soon after the September 11 attack, that “America is the greatest source of good in the whole of human history”. But it is humility that helps to build bridges in times of crisis, not self-righteousness. Human sacrifice, once an integral part of religious expression, gradually gave way to animal sacrifice as a means of placating or pleasing an angry god. We like to think that we in the enlightened west have long since left such practices behind. But we have not. Perverse ideologies spawned by the Judaeo-Christian heritage still accept as inevitable the sacrifice of innocent people for the common good. Allied soldiers, who have after all been trained to kill, are in “civilised warfare” and protected at all costs, while civilians (and proxy soldiers) are not granted such luxury. God, forever waiting in the wings, has an insatiable appetite for human blood, and he is not fussy what race, creed or ideology supplies it. Texts celebrating the cruel demands and exploits of this god abound in Jewish, Christian and Muslim holy books. It is incumbent on their teachers to look again at how to deal with scripture that preaches intolerance, violence and oppression. We have seen how divisive religions can be. The challenge is to to discover that which unites religious people, and to act upon it. We need to rediscover the alternatives to the myth of redemptive violence - the belief that violence saves, war brings peace, might is right. According to the Christian scriptures the crucified Jew challenges us to “love our enemies” (Matthew 5). The Jewish teacher, Paul, in his letter to the Romans, declares: “Do not overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good” (12). This kind of love makes “the other”, be they friend or foe, a brother or sister. Such practice is subversive, because in doing away with an “us-them” mentality, my shelter becomes my enemies’ shelter, my food a shared meal with another who could be a criminal or a terrorist. A love that is unconditional is exactly what it says. It is that love that builds a firm foundation for peace with justice, a peace that is the dynamic of operation infinite forgiveness. Herein lies the essence of the life and teaching of the Crucified Jew. President Bush challenged the world with the words, “are you for us or for our enemies?” Words that were in fact first uttered by Joshua, in the Jewish scriptures (Joshua 5) when confronted by a divine messenger holding a sword. The latter replied: “Neither.” On hearing this unexpected reply, Joshua knelt in humility. My hope is that all of us, along with President Bush and his supporters, are doing the same as 2005 continues to unfold. In search of a gentle God -Geraint ap Iorwerth Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Geraint_Ap_Iorwerth http://EzineArticles.com/?A-Gentle-God&id=21645 loan cash mortgage kosters cash loans no credit check consolidation loan personal loans apply online

By Teddy Shabba Most if not all men who haven’t had the type of success they would like with women at one point or another have said at least to themselves that they would like to know how to attract women. Yet, for the most part the majority of these men are simply stating a preference rather than actually making a decision to do whatever it takes in order to attract women. In other words most men would be willing to do what they already have been doing and maintain the same habits and beliefs to attract women even though they already have solid proof that what they have been doing isn’t working for them now. Of course, most men don’t consciously make this decision instead they simply allow their unconscious mind to continue doing the behaviors and habits that are not attracting women. On the other hand, men who have truly made the decision to do whatever it takes to attract women have cut themselves off of any other possibility when it comes to women. Instead of continuing to allow their unconscious mind to control their habits and behavior they chose to consciously create habits and behaviors that actually help them attract women by changing their belief system. Now, when it comes to changing your belief system it is important that you know that it can happen overnight and that when you change it you change it with a belief that is actually going to help you attract women and not just another belief that doesn’t help you attract women only in a different way. The easiest way to make sure that you change it to a belief that is going to help you attract women is to get your new belief from someone who already has success with women to begin with. Teddy Shabba is a Dating Coach for Men who has a daily newsletter that provides you with a wealth of information on how to be more successful with women. You can sign up for the Teddy Shabba Dating Advice Newsletter for Men now. Also with over 500 articles from a variety of dating experts just for men our Dating Advice and Seduction Article Database is the perfect place for any man. To learn more about How To Attract Women visit our article section Attract Women Today. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Teddy_Shabba http://EzineArticles.com/?Changing-Yourself-To-Attract-Women&id=413157 no co-signer no collateral bad credit loan multiple paycheck systems johnny paycheck aka donnie young cash advance australia

By CD Mohatta For all of us family is very important. We share very deep bond and affinity with our family. Our parents, our siblings and our children are the people who make our world apart from our spouse. How to wish family members on their birthday with free birthday ecards? Let us find out. Birthdaty ecards for father and mother- please look for subdued colors. Prefer nature as the image background. Try to get free ecards with large font sizes and look for text that is heart warming. Birthdaty ecards for brother- you grew up with your brothers. You know their color choice better than anybody else. Send ecards that translates your feelings as closely as possible. An ecard written with some text about the childhood spent together will be a good choice. Birthdaty ecards for sister - don’t select very bright colors. Warm colors would be preferable to cool colors, as they look more emotional. Use text that talks about a brother/sister’s love for sister. If your sister has any special preference, try to find a card accordingly. Birthdaty ecards for son and daughter- pour your parental love in the ecard. Let the ecard be very warm looking with text that describes a parent’s love. Use bright and very cheerful colors. The text should be funny with a message for your child’s future. For every family member, you should select different type of ecards to wish a happy birthday. Your relation with them, age difference and their preference would help you look for the ecard that would make them enjoy your birthday wishes. CD Mohatta writes for ecards, greeting cards and online cards. If you are looking for Free birthday ecards that look good and will make the recipient happy, please chose from - Birthday Ecards from http://www.ecarduniverse.com/ The author recommends http://www.yourfungames.com/games/ as a big resource of free online games of all types. Download them and play free for as many hours as you want. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=CD_Mohatta http://EzineArticles.com/?Free-Birthday-eCards—How-To-Select-For-Family?&id=201896 bad credit auto loan application christmas quick cash advance payday loans for savings account legal case summaries on payday loan companies

By Laura Adams Candidates experience and credentials, as detailed in the resume, are most often the frequently used criteria for determining which job applicants are deserving of a personal interview. Ultimately, though, the hiring decision is going to be heavily based upon the candidates performance in the interview and their value to the organization. To impress an interviewer, you have to be able to distinguish yourself from other candidates and be prepared to ’sell’ your qualifications to the interviewer. How can you do this? Present a polished professional image Remember that professional companies are looking to hire professional individuals, not the beach bum who just shook the loose sand from his hair. Dress conservatively in a well-fitting suit and keep jewelry, makeup, and fragrances to a minimum. Its also important to always take a shower, brush your teeth, and comb your hair before an interview as well to present to clean, polished image. Spend some time to research the organization prior to the interview Doing outside research on your own time to prepare for the interview demonstrates your commitment to hard work and your sincere interest in the organization. Study up on the company’s products and services, industry, target market, annual sales, structure, and any other key information. Managers will be impressed by your research. Prepare specific examples of how your skills and experience make you a strong fit for the organizations needs Practice answering tough, directed questions about your experience and be prepared to draw colorations between your experience and that needs of the organization. For example, if the position requires strong analytical skills, you should have example ready to demonstrate your strong analytical skills. Have you faced any challenges that forced you to think quickly on your feet? How do you go about evaluate alternatives when you have to justify a decision on a project? Prepare and ask intelligent questions about the company and position Your research on the organization will also come in handy when it comes time to formulate a series of intelligent questions you want answered. Since the interviewing process is an evaluation tool for both the individual and the organization, it is in your best interest to gather as much information about the potential opportunity as possible. Asking well thought-out questions shows that you are serious about the opportunity at hand and indicates the level of your knowledge about the company to the interviewer. Pay attention to your body language. You want to exude self-confidence and poise during an interview. Maintain eye contact, smile pleasantly, and keep your body attentive but relaxed throughout the meeting. Avoid fidgeting, clearing your throat, and breaking eye contacts as these are all signs of an anxious person. Conclude the meeting by thanking the interviewer for his time and shaking his hand. End the interview on a strong positive note by thanking and acknowledging the time the interviewer spent meeting with you. Its important that interviewer know that you value his time - after all, he could just have easily been doing something else. Write a quick Thank You message to the individual(s) who interviewed you. It only takes a few minutes to pen a Thank You note to an interviewer, but the gesture speaks volumes about your professionalism and the importance you place on good customer service. If you treat the interviewer with gratitude and respect, you are likely to treat your co-workers and customers equally well. Laura Adams is a qualified careers advisor with 11 years experience. Insurance Employment Information - Resources, News, Tips and Views to help Insurance Professionals find their dream jobs. http://www.Insurance-Job.info Copyright Insurance-Job.info This article may be reproduced as long as the resource box and live links remain intact. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Laura_Adams http://EzineArticles.com/?How-To-Impress-At-An-Interview,-And-Land-That-Job&id=133050 aw wish pay day friday lyrics sba loans georgia w knight knight enterprises llc payday loan direc how to use your va home loan with bad credit